Tuesday, February 26, 2008

It Happened One Night

Last night was like most other nights during the week. Alan and I ate dinner, watched some Jeopardy! and skipped Wheel of Fortune to watch some of The Office, the British version.* I took Marti out for her last stroll of the night as I sent Alan back off to work to bring home the bacon. As I said, just like any other night. Except…..

…when I got back to the apartment the door didn't open as planned. It actually didn't open at all. It was locked, ergo, I was locked out. I knew I didn’t have my keys on me, but I checked anyway. Yep, no keys. Also, no phone. This was going to be fun. I had visions of myself asleep with Marti in the garage until Alan came home and ran me over with the car, thus waking me and maiming me simultaneously.

Luckily, it was only a little after 9 o’clock and I could hear my neighbor up and about with the telly on. I knock on his door, borrow his phone. Call Alan, twice, to no avail. Leave two frantic messages to get his arse home to save me. I take Marti outside…hoping that by some miracle Alan will check his messages. I know I can’t count on that entirely, so when the neighbor’s friend headed back upstairs after a smoke, I ask him if Charles would mind if I used his computer. So I emailed Alan, whilst Marti was running around trying her darndest to be difficult and embarrassing, with the urgent message:

Subject: come home
Message: Come home ASAP. I'm locked out!! No phone.

I thanked Charles for his help, told him I’d knock again if I needed shelter, and went outside to wait. Shortly thereafter my knight in shining armor came tearing down the street to save me and we laughed about how not only did he lock the door, but I watched him do it with my own eyes and neither of us even flinched.

The ordeal only lasted about 30 minutes, but was a good reminder:

  • Keep a cell phone on you at all times except in the shower

  • Don’t count on said cell phone to save you, therefore, use other resources when necessary

  • Memorize husband’s work phone number for emergencies

  • Maybe hide a key outside

  • If all else fails, have a pug with you for warmth and company


*It’s a great show, innit? It makes me want to speak with an accent and insert Britishisms into my blog. Bonus points if you can find them!

6 comments:

Quinn's Mom said...

LOL. That sucks! But at least you were so resourceful!

Anonymous said...

Things to remember:

1. Hide a sledge hammer in garage to beat door down.

2. NEVER NEVER leave a message on Alan's cell phone!! You have a better chance of getting a date with the Statue of Liberty than him returning a call!! Call the Marines....ect., but not Alan!!!!

TOM

Jenn said...

Love this story, especially with it's happy ending and moral. Favorite line: "thus waking me and maiming me simultaneously." lol.

I guess three Brit-isms...is that, right? I know there are two for sure...the third one might be a bit of an English stretch. I'd list them, but I don't want to ruin the game for all!

Julie VanErem said...

I think you should begin using the accent on a daily basis. Life is far more interesting with an accent. =)

I count 4...

elizabethjune said...

If you like the Office, you should check out Extras. Wow. That's some funny British shite.

Grittybeard said...

Extras is awesome based on my Youtube work avoidance experiences. I only count two, but I read too many British authors so I might just be acclimated.

Al's good with email which is my main form of communication (other than google chat). It makes me want to call him just so that I feel he's as hard to reach as everyone else does.