Terrible Twos

Although Marti isn’t yet two, she is in the full throes of asserting her independence. It seems that for each trick she learns she takes one step backwards by losing another talent. So far she’s shown her puppy brilliance with several commands: sit, stay, down, come, leave it, drop it, shake and “come snuggly,” which any seasoned dog trainer knows means “jump onto the bed and play.” She even knows how to “get your Santa,” who has had several more surgeries and numerous stitches since I last mentioned him. She even gives lots of kisses.


So while Marti has gained all of these talents, she’s never quite mastered walking politely. I never had trouble getting her to walk though; she was always so excited to be outdoors that she would pull and pull and drag me along wherever she wanted to go. I laughed at a woman on TV who wasn’t able to get her basset hound to walk with her. She would end up dragging him, on his side, down the street. Then she’d finally pick him up and carry him. Silly dog owners, I thought. Don’t let your dog tell you what to do! Like a fool, I scoffed at her.

As Marti’s gotten older, she’s been improving on The Walk, until recently. One day she flat out decided she was done with The Walk. Stubbornness set in and she refused to go whichever direction I was going. So I’d pull her. And keep walking, with confidence and gusto, à la Cesar Milan, the Dog Whisperer. I’d change directions, going whichever way she seemed to want to go. None of this worked. You think, “She’s only 20 pounds! Come on, muscles!” But you underestimate Marti’s tenacity. Not only does she stop walking, but resolutely braces herself for the pull on the leash. Her front paws in front of her as wide as they can go, she sticks her butt up into the air while I tug, and vows to go undefeated.


Nothing I’ve done has helped, and a quick Google search tells me I’ve gone about it all wrong, and I’ve actually been encouraging the unwanted behavior.

I reasoned that it was probably the weather—the rain, the direction of the wind, the barometric pressure, maybe—that was making her stubborn. But it’s rarely the dog or the weather that is the problem; it’s the owner. And the truth is, I think she now knows that she’s the one in control and that she doesn’t actually have to do anything for herself. Yesterday I tried to take her out amid a rainstorm when I got home from work. She hadn’t gone all day, aside from #1 in the morning (she refused to walk so didn’t get the luxury of a #2 morning stop). I knew she had to go. I could see it in her eyes. But she wanted nothing to do with the rain. I had to pick her up to get her down the stairs. And once her princess paws touched the wet ground, I had to pick her up again to lug her into the grass.

This morning though, it was ridiculous. Wouldn’t walk. Wouldn’t go. I somehow made it to the other side of the building, where she stopped walking altogether. Finally having had enough of her antics, I unclipped her leash and walked off. By the time I was 50 feet away, I could see her concern. “Wait! What are you doing? Why are you leaving me?” So she followed, just like I knew she would. She even did her business, and then sprinted back to the apartment. But I’ve had enough. Today I start working on the walk. I can’t handle the embarrassment any more. I can’t have the maintenance guys watch me as I try to coax Marti down the stairs. I can’t have our neighbors watch me pick her up and drag her into the grass. This will be fixed. Hopefully I can teach an 18-month-old Marti new tricks.

Positive Puppy PR

Just thought I'd share this article. Maybe the people in California should take note.

Progress Report

We’re a few months into 2007, and I’ve been meaning to do a New Year’s Resolution update, so what better time than March 19?

1. Read the Bible. I am surprisingly dedicated to my nightly readings, except for the past two weeks, and then only because I’ve been trying to finish a borrowed book so I can return it. I’m about 250 pages into the Bible, and I’ve completed the first four books. Now that I’m done with my other book, I can refocus my efforts. I consider this resolution a success in progress.

2. Find a job. Ok, no luck on this one so far. I think this will be easier once I’m out in California. I’m either grossly overqualified so they aren’t calling me, or maybe they can sense my desperation via e-mail. Either way, I’m sure I’ll be employed at some point in the future. I consider this resolution a success-soon-to-come.

3. Find a home. Ok, also no luck here. But it’s not for lack of trying. I’m still confident we’ll find a suitable home. I consider this resolution a test in patience.

4. No fast food. I’ve done fabulously well on this one, I must say, even taking into account some slip-ups. I didn’t eat any fast food from mid-October until mid-February. Mid-February was our trip to California, and I was forced to partake in some fast food. I’ve also since eaten LJS and Sonic, but that’s much better than my norm. I call this a medium success. I figure if I can make it until June, I’ll consider it a super-size success.

5. Nicer, more patient. Success! I think I’ve done well on this one, mostly because I didn’t have a long way to go. Ha! I think some of the unknowns in my life at this time have been a help in increasing my patience.

6. Workouts. I can pretty much say at this point in time that working out is a part of my lifestyle. It’s way too hard to get back into shape once you lose your buff stuff, so I try to keep up with it as much as possible. I’m doing the Self Challenge right now, and on days that I’m lazy, I at least try to take Marti for a good walk. Never underestimate the power of a power walk! Plus, I’ve been hitting the Zumba dance floor and it’s a blast. I consider this resolution a success!

7. Keeping Marti out of puppy hospital. She has been healthy, hurray! A few days of hunger strikes here and there, but I think she just has a sensitive system. Another success!


All in all I’m pretty proud of my sticktoitiveness regarding my resolutions. You know I'll be yelling from the mountain tops once I get a couple of these suckers done.

Out of control

I’m not a control freak. Or, at least, I try not to be. I prefer the house to be clean, but I’ve stopped dedicating whole Saturdays to chores. Instead I sleep in for way too long for no apparent reason. I would like my hubby to be home more, but I don’t demand that he be home for dinner, or even at 8 p.m. I instead go with the ebb and flow of his comings and goings. I’d like Marti to not run the household, but I let her sleep with us, which is probably the cause of my weekend sleep marathons.

So while I try not to control everything in life, I do like to maintain some semblance of control over some of the big things: where I live and where I work. Needless to say, this move is throwing me for a loop. I’m excited to move to sunny California. And while it’s the unknown that is super exciting, it’s also the unknown that is driving me bonkers. Not only do we not know where we’re going to live or where I’m going to work, we don’t even know when the move will happen. The time frame wouldn’t bother me if it weren’t for the fact that because of a severe lack of communication among some of the higher-ups, I've been replaced at my job since October. Sure, it's not my fault that I never set a date I'd be leaving, but I still feel uncomfortable, like someone is breathing down my neck. So I'm trying to let go of my old responsibilities, while staying productive, which is an interesting dichotomy to attempt.

Before Alan and I moved into our current apartment complex, we cased Lawrence, weighed pros and cons, and pretty much had the pick of location and price. Moving to the Stanford-area we've found that nothing is in our control. There are few large complexes, they only know 30 days in advance what they'll have available, and very few accept pets, let alone dogs, as you all know from previous posts. I actually called another apartment yesterday that was in our perfect locale. When asked if he accepted dogs, he said, "Well, it depends on the dog." Then he proceeded to ask "How do you ensure that your dog doesn't bark all day?" Come again?? Are you serious? Are the walls so thin that neighbors can hear every bark and growl? Have people really complained that much in the past? Should I run a tape recorder all day to see if she barks? And do we get kicked out if she does? I understand their concern, no one wants to live next a nuisance barker, but these folks act like they have a community of delicate, super-sensitive old people with above-average hearing who will complain the very instant they hear the slightest peep out of a beast. Leaving Marti is not an option. Anyone who knows me knows that I would give up a limb before I would move away without her. So, I'm still conducting the apartment search, and working with Marti every day on the "no bark" rule. I even had a barking victory yesterday morning: she only barked a couple of times at the hair dryer! A few of her attempted barks turned into stifled I-wasn't-going-to-bark yawns when I pointed and shushed her.

The job issue is a whole other ball of wax. I'm convinced that I'm not getting responses because I have a Kansas address. I've been perfectly qualified and capable of several jobs, and yet, nothing. It's not exactly convenient or cost-effective to up and fly to California for an interview, but I would do it, and I just don't think they take a Kansas candidate seriously. Or maybe I have a huge, glaring typo on my resume and it hit the rubbish bin long ago.

I did go for about 6 weeks of not worrying about work, jobs, apartments, anything. I think Alan was getting a little concerned. When I finally had a minor fit of anxiety this week, he seemed quite relieved. He's too busy worrying about other things so he counts on me to do our worrying for the both of us. But luckily, today I'm back to "don't worry, be happy" mode.

Beat It!

For those of you unfamiliar with Book It!, first of all, you’re missing out. The reading program rewards students with Pizza Hut 6-inch Personal Pan pizzas for meeting reading goals set in the classroom. Reading? Pizza? Reading AND pizza? My 6-year-old self was in heaven.

The program is simple. From October 1 through March 31, participating teachers set a monthly reading goal for each student. Those who meet the goal get a certificate they can redeem at Pizza Hut for a free Personal Pan Pizza.

Critics have, of course, come out to denounce the program. I recently read an article on CNN (see, still reading…) that details the positives and negatives of Book It! and I feel the need to state my support. The opponents in the article make a number of ridiculous claims, which I seek to destroy one by one.

One of the criticisms is that it turns teachers into “corporate promoters.” This, the most valid of their points, still makes anger boil up inside me. The corporation isn’t sponsoring gang violence. It isn’t promoting smoking, drinking or other illicit behavior. All things considered, there are far worse things that corporations could be doing other than promoting literacy and delicious pizza.

The other big problem with pairing pizza and reading is, you guessed it, the pizza. With childhood obesity on the upswing, experts worry that the Book It! program will encourage junk food consumption and contribute to the already growing problem (pun not totally intended). Although I excelled at reading, I was also decent at math. And if I did the math correctly, with the program running for six months, and with monthly reading goals, even the most bookish child is entitled to no more than six pan pizzas. One pizza a month. A personal pan pizza, with pepperoni, comes in at 640 calories. It takes 3,500 calories, on top of your normal calorie requirements, to gain one pound. As you can see, this one pizza isn’t enough to cause massive weight gain.

In the article, Susan Linn, a Harvard psychologist and co-founder of the Campaign for a Commercial-Free Childhood, claims that the program undermines parents by positioning family visits to Pizza Hut as an integral component of raising literate children. I think this is going a bit far. The program doesn’t say, “You will raise illiterate children if you don’t participate in Book It!” It says, “Read and get rewarded!”

Linn also asserts that schools are trying to reduce students’ access to soda, and contends that Book It! should face similar scrutiny. Talk about comparing apples and oranges. The kid isn’t going to go up to the Pizza Hut vending machine and consume crazy amounts of pizzas every day. The Campaign for a Commercial-Free Childhood site could be a whole other blog entry. It discusses companies marketing to kids, ’tweens and teens. The site mentions the Bratz dolls’ book line, which is promoted to kids through Scholastic book fairs. I’ve seen these dolls, and if my children ever want to bring home these pseudo-prostitutes, they would have to go through me, which is the point: We’re forgetting the fact that the parents are responsible. Kids aren’t driving to the Pizza Hut to gorge on pizza. Kids aren’t at Target purchasing Bratz dolls. Parents seem to be an element that has been left out of the equation. Parents are the ones responsible for their children, from what goes into their mouths to what goes into their brain to what TV programs they watch. If the child is active, as a child should be, one pizza a month won’t cause him to be obese. It’s up to the parent to say “no” to their child. It’s not Verizon Wireless’ fault that kids are getting cell phones. It’s not Pizza Hut’s fault children are obese. People are responsible for their own actions and people need to stop trying to point their fingers at everything EXCEPT the problem itself. If overall lifestyles were balanced—exercise, healthy foods—a few splurges a month on pizza isn’t going to cause obesity.

While some kids may try to be sneaky and get out of reading at their level, (see who might do this) most kids won’t try to do this. I was 414-books crazy, and would have read whether I got rewarded for it or got punished for it. Not all kids are like that, but the ones who don’t like to read should be encouraged to do it. It can only help them out down the road, and I think Pizza Hut’s program helps the cause. I’m not saying the program is a cure-all. It takes parental encouragement, good teachers and good books to get kids to love reading, and some never will. But the program shouldn’t get the boot because the program is not the problem.

But the article didn’t only tell the bad side:

“We’re really proud of the program,” said Leslie Tubbs, its director for the past five years. “We get hundreds of e-mails from alumni who praise it and say it helped them get started with reading.”